Abortion is not the solution because: ANYTHING WOULD HAVE BEEN BETTER THAN THIS
I hate to admit it but I am out of touch with my emotions. As a woman this often puts me at a disadvantage. I am supposed to be emotional. Understand how and what and why I am feeling, what it is I am feeling.
But I just don't. Never have.
As a child, my emotions used to manifest themselves in my stomach. My distress only noticed when I could no longer eat. Or by the near constant pain and gnawing in my gut. My sadness, literally, made me ill. Today, I still struggle to understand my emotions, but gone are the days of my ever-present stomach pain... or so I thought.
I didn't see the headline, or maybe I did but decided not to notice it. Either way, it had gone largely undetected. My mom had been the one to finally bring the news to my attention. Her heart was broken by it and she needed to speak out. That's the thing with abortion - it literally destroys everything and everyone it touches. It had stolen her grandchild and nearly shattered her daughter. It had left its mark and she reached out in her pain.
It has felt like an unabating barrage since. An onslaught of comments and opinions fill every newsfeed I consume. And, internally, the shame and accusations play-on, too. Like a song I just can't seem to get out of my head. But the worst of it all is that old companion that has returned; this week has literally been gut-wrenching.
I wish I were stronger, I find myself thinking. Or maybe just further along in this journey of healing from abortion. But the truth is, I'm fragile. So fragile, in fact, I long to remain quiet. But quiet has never brought the peace I desired. For there is freedom in the truth spoken boldly.
And so, I write.
Again. Of the "choice" that will haunt me for the rest of this life. Speaking up, again, for every side of this debate. Because I need you to know this: Abortion will destroy anything and everything it touches.
I had my baby aborted when I was just 19. Not even 1 year out of high school I was impoverished and living in someone else's apartment. I was an unwed, pregnant teenager. I was alone. Isolated. Unaware of who I could turn to for help. I rarely speak of the circumstances surrounding my abortion. Maybe it felt like trying to excuse my culpability away. But the truth, I'm afraid, is that the reasons no longer matter. Because, the moment I walked out of that abortion clinic I knew: Anything would have been better than this.
Did you read that? Anything would have been better than this!
You see, I walked into that abortion clinic a poor, desperate, pregnant teenager and walked out a shattered, poor, desperate, hopelessly broken teenager. Abortion wasn't a solution. And it still isn't.
My heart longs to see abortion ended. But, I also know that simply mandating-it and condemning the women who have abortions is not the solution. Many women feel trapped in their circumstances. Hopeless and utterly alone. Heartlessly berating them will not lead to anything other than alienation and further isolation. And sadly, more abortions. This does not mean we stop speaking out - that would be absurd! We must continue to speak for the ultimate victims of abortion: the innocent, voiceless, and helpless babies. But we must recognize that simply speaking is not enough.
So what can we do? If legislation is only a small part - and I do believe it is a part - then what? Practically speaking? Give. Give! Of your time, your abilities, your money, your homes, and most importantly your compassion. Show love - always. Seek to understand.
My goal in writing is not to add further to the "noise" of this past week. Nor is it my mission to condemn or condone anyone's behavior. My desire comes from a place of desperation. I am desperate for you to know: Abortion is not the solution because anything would have been better than this.
**You can read more of MY ABORTION STORY here.
But I just don't. Never have.
As a child, my emotions used to manifest themselves in my stomach. My distress only noticed when I could no longer eat. Or by the near constant pain and gnawing in my gut. My sadness, literally, made me ill. Today, I still struggle to understand my emotions, but gone are the days of my ever-present stomach pain... or so I thought.
I didn't see the headline, or maybe I did but decided not to notice it. Either way, it had gone largely undetected. My mom had been the one to finally bring the news to my attention. Her heart was broken by it and she needed to speak out. That's the thing with abortion - it literally destroys everything and everyone it touches. It had stolen her grandchild and nearly shattered her daughter. It had left its mark and she reached out in her pain.
It has felt like an unabating barrage since. An onslaught of comments and opinions fill every newsfeed I consume. And, internally, the shame and accusations play-on, too. Like a song I just can't seem to get out of my head. But the worst of it all is that old companion that has returned; this week has literally been gut-wrenching.
I wish I were stronger, I find myself thinking. Or maybe just further along in this journey of healing from abortion. But the truth is, I'm fragile. So fragile, in fact, I long to remain quiet. But quiet has never brought the peace I desired. For there is freedom in the truth spoken boldly.
And so, I write.
Again. Of the "choice" that will haunt me for the rest of this life. Speaking up, again, for every side of this debate. Because I need you to know this: Abortion will destroy anything and everything it touches.
I had my baby aborted when I was just 19. Not even 1 year out of high school I was impoverished and living in someone else's apartment. I was an unwed, pregnant teenager. I was alone. Isolated. Unaware of who I could turn to for help. I rarely speak of the circumstances surrounding my abortion. Maybe it felt like trying to excuse my culpability away. But the truth, I'm afraid, is that the reasons no longer matter. Because, the moment I walked out of that abortion clinic I knew: Anything would have been better than this.
Did you read that? Anything would have been better than this!
You see, I walked into that abortion clinic a poor, desperate, pregnant teenager and walked out a shattered, poor, desperate, hopelessly broken teenager. Abortion wasn't a solution. And it still isn't.
My heart longs to see abortion ended. But, I also know that simply mandating-it and condemning the women who have abortions is not the solution. Many women feel trapped in their circumstances. Hopeless and utterly alone. Heartlessly berating them will not lead to anything other than alienation and further isolation. And sadly, more abortions. This does not mean we stop speaking out - that would be absurd! We must continue to speak for the ultimate victims of abortion: the innocent, voiceless, and helpless babies. But we must recognize that simply speaking is not enough.
Show:
Empathy.
Kindness.
Love.
These will make a difference.
My goal in writing is not to add further to the "noise" of this past week. Nor is it my mission to condemn or condone anyone's behavior. My desire comes from a place of desperation. I am desperate for you to know: Abortion is not the solution because anything would have been better than this.
**You can read more of MY ABORTION STORY here.
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